Fortune Arterial: Kanade (GETTIN TIRED OF TREES)

January 10, 2013 on 1:40 am by Wahfuu | In Fortune Arterial, Video Games and Visual Novels | 3 Comments

Welcome!

Seriously! We got more trees here! Check it out!

You know, I have never understood the whole “war on moe” attitude some hipsters anime fans seem to have with things. I’m a bit indifferent to it myself, but sometimes fluffy bits filled with sappy but generic banter between the love interest and the male protagonist can create small smiles on people. Maybe it’s because the word “moe” has been tossed around so stupidly that everyone now associates everything with a high-school setting and anything with a cute female protagonist as “moe“. Now everyone feels the need to tell the rest of the world that anime has been taken over by it, and we should all fight the power and such, so we can get… unmoefied anime?

I think moe in every quantity can be enjoyable. And sometimes, even if the anime contains a ton of fluffy bits, you can still find yourself interested in the scenario and story despite it all.

For the record? This is not one of those times.

HEARTS FOR DAYS

Haruna is clearly wondering WHY SHE IS POSING AND NOT HELPING!?

Kanade, everyone! Definitely one of the best characters as far as generating laughter is concerned. Something horrible went wrong when Kanade and her sister were being conceived and somehow Kanade ended up being the older sister. This same mutation also generated her not-so-secret desire to turn into a man and marry her younger sister, too! While sudden genderbent wincest is always a good thing, I can’t say it’d fit this pair, so Kanade is stuck being a rather small-framed and energetic girl, and the subject of love for this play-through!

Not a ton to talk about here with Kanade, really. She’s one of the higher extremes of a genki girl. Breaking into the protagonist’s room without as much style as Kyousuke broke into classrooms, but with a hell of a lot of enthusiasm. She’s the dorm head too, which… I must really question who picks the people for these occupations in anime. She’s pretty good, but apparently runs her own small black market auction house during her free time. Which… sadly, reminds me of the pervert club of Majikoi. Putting my incredibly bad comparisons aside, I really wish they’d explain at least somewhat why she is always busy. I mean, “shes the dorm-head” only works so long. What does the dorm-head do? Well, dorm-head things of course! Come on now. What else could the dorm-head be doing?

Loud ones are always 50/50 with me. I’d give the pass to Kanade, though, as she is a pretty good source of entertainment and doesn’t really come off as annoying. I think some might disagree, however. Especially considering Kanade is the only reason why this route isn’t terribly boring, and if she isn’t your type of character, then this is going to be all bad times for you.

Our first piece of drama comes from actually getting into the relationship. Nothing is ever easy, apparently, especially not when you have the most predictable sibling drama in recent memory. In case you can’t already guess, Kanade sees Kouhei and Haruna getting along pretty well, despite Kouhei being obvious as hell crushing on Kanade. However, when it comes to this sort of thing (romance, love, etc) rule #1 is that everyone must immediately become denser then a black hole. So, Kanade gets absurdly jealous, completely and totally avoids Kouhei without telling him, which makes him really confused because he’s lost all his brain cells within the last hour of the route, and Haruna is just totally left in the dark.

This goes on for WAY too long, until finally Haruna tells her sister to stop being a complete moron because seriously this shit is stupid. She grows the left part of her brain back and goes up to Kouhei and confesses, we get a fairly cute scene, and that’s that! I probably left a few things out and I’m probably not being as descriptive as I normally am, but seriously. Everyone can fill in the blanks here. You’ve probably seen enough anime to know how this scenario would go with stick figures.

WE EVEN GOT THE BEACH!

Obligatory beach scene, because why not?!

 This is, sadly, the best part of the route, and why I put the whole moe message at the very beginning of this post. The romantic fluffy bits between Kouhei and Kanade are the only thing that I must say I actually enjoyed reading, and even then, it’s nothing overly exceptional, but that might be because everything else felt bland as hell to me. I might be totally insane too. Who knows. Who knows, indeed. Either way, this is where I actually enjoyed reading this part of the route. Sadly, it doesn’t last too long, because we gotta get back toooo…

Trees.

Yep. Trees.

Seriously, why is it always a tree? I have seen a tree kill people, grant wishes, turn into a symbol of hope and life and probably rule the world. It’s always a damn tree. So, what’s this tree, you may ask? Nothing special! Seriously. The tree has a rumor around the school that praying to it will help you with your love life, which apparently all the girls like. The last dorm-head who was around really liked this tree, and Kanade really liked her, which in turn made her like the tree. So, she really wanted to protect it. However, the tree is clearly dying. So close to dying to the point where the tree actually looks like it might fall over at any moment and hurt somebody.

Instead of cutting it down immediately, however, Kanade and Kouhei and pretty much everyone comes to help try and bring it back to life. Fertilizer, water, all sorts of work goes into the tree. It buds, once. And still you are told it has to get cut down. Kanade is pretty sad, obviously. She turns it on Kouhei briefly, but it gets resolved, and she says she wants to be the one to cut down the tree. And then we turn that stuff into a bench. Seriously? That’s what this has come to? Turning it into a bench? Well, it’s… an okay solution, I guess. Kind of don’t understand why they didn’t think of this in the first place, but maybe she really did just reallly like that tree. Seriously. Trees.

Well, better then a tree.

Fortune Arterial 2: There’s dirt on my bench!

 

ALRIGHT. WHAT DO I THINK?

Well. It was pretty bland and generic. As I said before, the fluffy bits were the only fun things I don’t think I wasted my time reading. The drama was really silly and felt way overblown. If hyper loud girls aren’t your thing, you probably won’t enjoy this portion in the slightest. I wouldn’t say I didn’t enjoy everything about it, but I can’t say the scenario or the drama made any of it. Kanade was enjoyable, but that was seriously about it.

I guess with all the vampires and crazy crap running around I was expecting a bit more, but this girl clearly had nothing to do with any of that. So, it’s probably my fault for expecting too much. Anyways, it’s Shiro next. Here’s hoping the big brother doesn’t kill me.

See you next time.
The girl with the same facial reaction!

Seriously, she’s always smiling. Always.

3 Comments »

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  1. Seriously does her facial expression ever change? Kinnnda creepy.

    Comment Shikon — January 11, 2013 #

  2. I actually noticed as I wrote the post that all these cg’s seemed to look familiar somehow. Maybe thats the twist. She’s actually a banshee coming to drain my life.

    Comment Wahfuu — January 11, 2013 #

  3. Her expression is a testament to devour your soul, only after shes eaten it will that expression change o.0….or not who knows

    Comment Shikon — January 11, 2013 #

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